Sam, by Constantina Venetis


Along with my therapist,
We gave her a name,
so I could think I was sane,
I referred to her as Sam.

Sam laughed, she cried, she screamed, she lied.

She lied to her true self,
Masking her abundant emotions,
Hard to often verbalize,
She told herself she could go on.

Even when her body signaled to pause.

Hard to get out of bed,
Or eat breakfast.

Her mind is her biggest enemy,
Battle after battle,
Tummy in between her legs.

Why can’t life be simple,
Sun on my face,
But no smile to embrace,
As I write about the human race.

My heart might jump out of my chest,
My wrist in constant tremor,
Can’t forget about the lingering pounding in my head,
And the constant loss of neurons,
The doc said that’s the meds.

But what about the thoughts I ask,
That keep me from doing what I love,
With who I love,
Who controls them?

I am sure that’s not my meds,
Perhaps Sam?

Van Gough and Robin Williams,
Might have felt the same way,
We’ll never truly know.

God please forgive them,
They felt they couldn’t go on.

And that’s the point you see.

We all wear masks,
Some more than others,
But facing our fears,
Will make us that much stronger.

That much closer to good health,
Fulfilling our dreams,
Receiving, giving love, to those who need.

You see achievement is great,
But can only get you so far.

You must prepare yourself,
To manage what you can’t always prepare for.

The mind is the most complex game of them all,
Sam keeps paying unexpected visits.

So squash her like a bug,
Pray to your Lord,
Do whatever works for you,
To learn how to love.

Love the life that was given to you,
The life you deserve.

Embrace it with open arms,
Even when the turbulence turns.

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